Losing A Whole Year..
But I'm back now
It's been a year. A LONG YEAR. The booker is my friend and he asked me to be there. Being honest, who else is using me? I love to wrestle and people seek to use me as a side show and a clown. I've had people ask me to do things that are down right racist. They don't see it. But they were and are. I'm not gonna lower myself or my pride for myself to work for someone who claims to be my friend and yet asks me to perform like a minstrel. I can't do it. I won't do it. I will never do it. I don't expect anyone to understand. I'm not the same person I was. I've grown. Emotionally and spiritually. No one is ever gonna take my pride from me. Yes, I worked for ACPW and I am proud to still be able to lace my boots. I am a WRESTLER. It's been a year and looking back, a great deal of the situation was our two (Chris and mine) egos clashing. His, because the product was his and mine because I had too much pride about what I felt I created. The problem with my part was I felt I created it on my own and I was too selfish to let go of the reins. After reading Maverick's blog about ACPW and the year that was I re-examined a lot of my feelings. But I still felt like " I may have been wrong, but I'm not going to beg anyone for a job". I was too prideful. I was just tired. In my mind, I felt like I was being misused and mistreated. I have a family and real life concerns. I treated EVERYONE I that I came into contact with as a friend and a brother. I felt like I wasn't getting the same in return. I felt I didn't need the abuse that badly. I had other options and have always been exercising them. I don't bear or harbor any ill will or hard feelings to anyone over anything. As I stated before, it's a fact of life and it is what it is. I'm older now. I know better. I'm not sure if most of you know but I have been moving in a different direction spiritually as of late. I have come a lot closer to God in recent months. He's brought me through some serious trials and I am praying and thanking Him everyday.My Savior is the most important thing to me along with my family. I'm never putting them behind a sport or a promotion ever again. I am back at ACPW. I am working just about every weekend other places. I'm having fun being a wrestler again. I wouldn't begrudge that to any of you or anyone and I pray none of you won't begrudge that to me.
Thanks for listening and understanding.
(This blog was composed from edited portions of emails to friends of mine today. I figured I would send this to anyone concerned to clear up any confusion. Be Blessed..)